I remember the day Paul said to me, “We are supposed to move, I know we are.” I asked him if he was sure and he said yes he knew it is what God was asking of us. I started crying and hugged him and we held each other full of relief and hope and complete blind faith.
I had known for a little while before Paul finally felt confident too. We made the decision together last June but I had already gotten my confirmation from the Lord in May. It came from Gibson, our oldest son.
A little back story…in 2016 when we were throwing around the idea of moving, we would talk openly in front of the kids about moving somewhere. We’d be saying things like “Let’s just move to Europe.” or “Fiji would be a good place to live.” Just goofing around mostly, but anytime we talked like that, Gibson would cry real tears and beg us not to move. It would honestly tear him up inside. He would say that he never wanted to be away from his family and friends. He was genuinely upset and scared at the idea of it.
So we stopped mentioning it in front of the kids. We realized that we knew we were joking but they didn’t and we saw how much it upset Gibson. So we would talk about it in private and pray about it on our own. We stopped talking about it in front of the kids.
Months went by and as we felt that more and more it might be what was right for us, my mama’s heart hurt. I pictured sharing the news with Gibson and him being so so sad and resent us and God for making him move. Gibson is the kind of kid that is black and white. He would know that if God spoke it to Paul and I that we would need to obey. And I was afraid that he would grow to resent God for asking our family to do that. I hated the thought of it.
The concept of submitting to God’s will even when it’s difficult and doesn’t make complete sense is hard for an adult to grasp much less a six-year-old! So my prayer became like this, “God if this is your will for our family, I need you to speak to Gibson personally. I need you to tell him that it is what you are asking of our family and that he will know that it’s your voice. I pray that when he knows, that his whole countenance would change and he would actually be excited about moving to California.”
So here’s where this story gets really awesome…. May of 2017, I am getting ready for church and I’m playing a Bethel instrumental album in the background. I’m sitting at my makeup vanity and Gibson is on the floor playing with Lego’s. The following conversation goes something like this…
Gib- “Is this music from Bethel?”
Me- “Yeah Buddy it is.”
Gib- “They make the most beautiful music. Maybe we should go there sometime. Maybe we could live there.”
Me- “That would be so cool but you know they are in California like 30 hours away from here. If God tells us to go we will. But that’s a big move, we need to know that is what God is saying.”
Gib- “Is that what God told us to do?”
Me- “I’m not sure bud. Why don’t you ask God and see what He says to you.”
So Gibson shook his head and looked out the window with a look of concentration. He was silent for about 2 minutes as if he was really listening. It was honestly so sweet and kind of surprising to watch him really trying to hear. He was 6 years old mind you.
As I was starting to wonder if he had trailed off in his mind and was now thinking about the birds outside the window he turned to me and looked me straight in the eye and said this…
“Mom, God said we are an awesome family and we need to go be a part of that church.”
Tears flowed and I was stunned. He was so confident. I asked him if was sure and if he understood what he was saying. And then he blew me away even more by answering with genuine excitement, “Yes mom, I know. That’s the first time I’ve ever heard God’s voice!!!”
And since that day Gibson has been sure that it is what God is asking the Stern family to do and he is truly excited and hasn’t pushed back once.
It was literally the mama’s prayer I had prayed and the confirmation I needed to know that it, in fact, was what God was asking us to do! For me, I knew that God had heard my cry and assured me that my babies would be ok with this move, that it wouldn’t destroy them, that it wouldn’t make them resent us or God. We were involving our kids in our testimony and inviting them to be part of our faith and participate in waiting on God’s voice.
Which a side note- my middle son who has autism and loves structure and doesn’t do well with change, is the most excited of us all! He talks about moving to California all the time and can’t wait!
So that was our first confirmation of many more to come….
join me next week to hear the next one (As I’m writing these stories my faith is being strengthened again! I hope it strengthens yours. God is not just some mythical creature up in the sky. He’s our father, he loves us, and He is faithful to lead us and guide us in everything!!!)